Name: Stephanie
Bremerton, WA
Number of kids: 2
Ages of kids: 5 months, 3 1/2 years
Problem: My 3 year old will not go on the potty every time, he does okay if you remind him, but if you don't he will go to the bathroom in his pants. I have tried Pull ups, underwear, everything and nothing seems to work. I have even tried rewarding him with candy and other fun things to do. Also another problem that I am having with him that he absolutely will not go poop in the toilet, only in his pants. HELP!!!!
Solution submitted by Mary from Antigonish, Nova Scotia: Stephanie, I can certainly sympathize with you.After bringing home my second baby my first child went totally backwards(she was 18 months)went back to the bottle,totally on diapers again it was very hard.It was only after my third child was born that she decided she was going to be a big girl.I put her in panties it took about 2 wks before she was able to recognize the feeling of having to go. You have to be patient he'll go when he's ready no matter what rewards I offered it didn't make a difference. It was just in the last month she started doing #2 in the toilet.She was very excited when I told her that I was very proud of her.I know it's tough and you probably think he's never going to be trained but it will happen when he makes it happen.Just don't make him feel bad about doing it in his pans. I found it helped when I knew she was going to go #2 to take her in the bathroom, sit her on the toilet and read to her while she TRIED to go.Sometimes she went sometimes she didn't but she at least she tried and to knew that was a accomplishment.You have to start somewhere right.I Sometimes had to sit there and read for 1 1\2 hrs but the look on her face when she did it was worth it. Good luck and hang in there. I'm now tying to train my 2 1\2 yr old she's doing better she has somebody to learn from, it's always tougher with the first one. Feel free to contact ma to tell me how your making out. E-mail rugrats@auracom.com GOOD LUCK!!!!!!
Another solution submitted by Sherry from Harrison, AK: If you haven't understood this yet, your son is "getting your goat". The only real solution at this point, is to get off his back (or butt). Children watch their parents very closely: for some children it is important that they please the parents, and for some it is more fun to get a "reaction". Kids have an inborn personality that you, as the parent, can do little about. That doesn't mean that if you have a mischievous little boy that he's not a great kid, or anything. Now, to the problem: stop pressuring him. Have patience, grit your teeth and keep changing those pull-ups! Believe it or not, the more you push, the harder he'll dig in his heels. Sooner or later he's going to get tired of being a "baby." Also, don't "baby" him too much. Make him pick up his own toys, don't make a big deal out of every "boo-boo," etc. And DO NOT try to make everything FUN. That simply doesn't work. Don't let everyone else - grandparents, aunts, and friends get involved. You must stop making a production out of the whole thing. I empathize with you if you are feeling a little embarrassed to have this rather large boy still going in his pants, but the focus should not be on how YOU feel. Don't think that anyone else believes you are a "bad mommy" because of this - there is no such thing as a perfect parent or a perfect kid. Most importantly, RELAX ! You have a very long road ahead of you, and bigger worries are to come . . . I hope everything turns out o.k. The best of luck to you.
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