Number of kids:
Ages of kids: 1, 10, 17, 20
Problem: My husband and have been together for 2.5 years and it has been very hard. When we first got married his son lived with us and his daughter stayed quite a bit over the summer. My husband and his ex does not get along at all. It is unbelievable the way she treats him after they have been divorced for seventeen years. She calls me and puts him down, she puts him down to her daughter and now to his sons girlfriend. This woman is at church every time the doors are open so I don't understand why she acts like a Christian but doesn't walk like a Christian. We have recently found that my stepdaughter has started a rumor about our one year daughter and it was that I purposely got pregnant to keep her dad. Her mother and her are actually telling people within their family and now to future family members. However, this is not true and would like some advice on how her father should approach with her outrageous rumor of her half sister. Our family has gone through so much with her, the ex who will not leave me alone, and his son and he never wants to say anything because it may hurt their feelings but what he can't seem to understand is I'm hurting and my 10 year old son is learning by his children and I do not want to go through this for the rest of my life. I have gone through a miscarriage due to his ex wife and daughter harassing and I still try to be his daughter's friend. As far as his ex I've tried talking to her and she just hangs up on me. She sends rumors through her daughter that my husband does this or that and did this to her and he'll do it to me. I've asked him to tell his daughter the truth about his relationship with her mother and why they divorced because she has really got a problem when it comes to her daddy's happiness.
Solution submitted by Les from Golden Lake, ONT, CAN: I sympathize with you situation. I have similar problems, although more subtle and maybe not as severe sounding. The only thing I can offer right now is a suggested reading, especially for your husband, which helped us some.(also helps if he can get the former wife to read it too). The name of the book is "Mom's House, Dad's House: Making Shared Custody Work" by Isolina Ricci. Even if it's not legally a shared custody situation it applies as far as I'm concerned. It deals a lot with feelings and attitudes of the divorced parents, how it affects the kids, and how to develop a "Working Relationship." There's also a chapter about remarriage and the problems that can come up. Makes me wonder if this was going on between them before he met you. The best of luck to you!
Editor's Note: The book mentioned above, may be ordered through the Parentsroom Bookstore in Association with Amazon.com by clicking on the title or book jacket above for $8.00 which is $2.00 off the list price (plus shipping and handling of course).
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