Name: PJC
San Diego, CA
Number of kids: 2
Ages of kids: 7 & 9
Problem: We have become a very busy family with both children in more than one activity. But with these activities I would still like to see them help around the house, do homework and practice the piano without complaining. I try to help them get organized but it seems the activities just get in the way. The latest activity that is especially time consuming is little league baseball. We realize that school work comes first but what about household chores and piano? I think my husband and I don't see this problem in the same light because he seems to continue to plan more practices which pushes the time there is to do other things to a minimum. I'm at a loss, I've considered requesting no weekday games from the league but I don't think I have the power to make a change like that. I've also tried to work things out with my husbands cooperation but no matter how much we discuss this issue the problem always comes up again on week nights when there is a game or a practice. My son loves baseball and I don't want to take it away from him but I would like him to be able to do his regular chores, homework, and piano at the same time. If anyone has suggestions please let me know.
Solution submitted by AJ from San Diego, CA: It looks like the real problem is you and your husband presenting a united front. You both need to sit down without the kids and figure out your priorities first, then everything else should fall under that framework. Watch out for those "distractions" like "but my kid loves (whatever the activity)." There is only so much time in a day, and as the parents, it is up to you to structure it. For example, in our house, family comes first (this includes daily chores and dinner together every night), then school (kid) and work (parents), then activities (when the first two priorities are being met). Activities are expendable to us. Baseball (or in our house, karate and gymnastics) are not considered things essential to becoming responsible adults, but only enhance their lives. This is the time to make sure the foundation of their life is solid...all the extracurricular stuff should build off of that. Yeah, it is hard to say no to your child. But isn't a parent's job to build a responsible adult that can deal with not always getting their way? Family first.
Another solution submitted by Kendell from Henderson, NV: I can certainly understand your concern and frustration. I have three boys and am pregnant with our fourth child. The older two are in baseball. They each have two games a week and a practice thrown in once a week...it is so hard to get homework and chores done with all the running around...we also run our business out of our house and only have one running car at the moment...sooo the only thing I have figured out is that knowing what time everything is during the week, we try and schedule homework and home chores around the ball schedule, and pray for sanity in between. GOOD LUCK!!! I wish I had an actual solution for you...all I can offer is some comfort in the realm of empathy.
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